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When it comes to relationships/dating, I guess sometimes when the timing is off, things just can't work out... For the first time in years, I took my walls down to show her how i felt... i went against the typical promoter move of flirting w/ other girls to diminish any of her insecurities... i treated her like a princess and treated her w/ as much respect as i could... although the outcome is not wat i wanted, i feel good b/c i gave it my shot and have no regrets for getting my feelings/thoughts off my chest...

What the mind tells you and what the heart tells you are two different things sometimes... wat i'm left with now is a heavy heart and pain... but what can u do? timing is a bitch... things we're going well (y fix if it aint broken as the saying goes), y take the break right?... well, sometimes even going w/ the flow is not enuff if she still has 'inner demons' to conquer first... i only wished she was willing to take the risk of going deeper in... but alas, she's not ready... she's too young (22)and have only had 2 previous relationships [inexperienced w/ no dating inbetween]... she wanted something of an open relationship but i can't handle open relationships (i know u fellas are thinking wtf this is the best type, but i personally dont believe in it)...maybe she'll come back but i will have moved on w/ another, or maybe she'll find that guy at the right time... only time/fate will tell... they say when u let someone go and they come back to you, then it was meant to be... if not, then then it was never meant to be... eh, many fishes in the sea... another chapter finished.

Within the last week, i have had my car broken into, stereo system stolen, survived a horrible car accident, and the above... not the best holiday but on the bright side, i've realized i still have my wonderful family and friends and thankful for being alive. =)

Happy holidays everyone.